Coming Together

It’s November, y’all?! No, really, it’s November! How is it already November?!

No matter how ill prepared I am that the year is almost up or that the Holidays are upon us, one thing I am looking forward to is being together with family. This time of year always bring about time spent with our extended families, sharing a meal or two, good conversation and laughter.

I have been lucky enough to get to kick start this year’s extended family activities early. Last weekend, I drove to Canton, Texas to meet up with my Dad. But it wasn’t just my Dad that I met up with, it was all my cousins, aunt and uncle. They all plan a trip together every year just to spend time with one another. Luckily for me, Canton is only 3 hours from Houston.

My Dad’s side of the family has always been close; sought each other out no matter how far away they live from one another. All my Dad’s cousins grew up together and hence developed this bond. I’ve always enjoyed being in their presence. They all have such a good time together, pickin’ on each other, crackin’ jokes and re-living the good ole days.

Family is so, so important. It is such a rarity that extended family like my Dad’s side has a bond and a friendship like they do. I admire it and I’m thankful I can see it modeled. I wish I had grown up like that with my cousins that are my age. I wish I had a family bond like that.

The older I get, the more important I find that our heritage is important. And our heritage doesn’t just come from our families, it comes from the community that we grew up in. Which is why the photo below describes me and my community so well.  I feel that we are so future focused and we don’t even realize the precious heritage that is slipping through our fingers. How many of us really know our families? Do we really know their story? Can you pass on to your children who they are or were? Do you know funny, silly, seemingly meaningless stories about them? And once those family members are gone, all of it’s gone.

I wish I could say I’ve done a tremendous job knowing my family. Heck, I can’t even say I know my Dad very well and my Mom is already gone. I can’t say I know funny stories about them growing up; what they aspired to be when they were kids; what silly stunts they pulled that got them in trouble. Time is fleeting! I spend so much time worrying about the future that I miss opportunities to get to know my heritage better.

My grandmother (my Mom’s Mom) just turned 92 years old last week! I relish visits and phone calls with her. She’s a talker! 😀 Every now and then I will get her to talk about when she and my grandfather met or what it was like for her to grow up on a farm, how she worked in a factory and how she and my grandfather made it all work. All these memories she shares are PRICELESS!

The other day, I pulled out a shoe shining kit. That little kit brought back so many memories. My little shoe shine kit is pretty pitiful, but the one I was reminded of was the one my Dad used when I was a little girl. I used to love it when he would pull out that kit in a wooden box. He would sit in the floor of our den and shine his work shoes. And I would plop myself down right beside him. I was fascinated by the different tools and the polish and how they made his shoes shine so pretty! He let me help which made me feel important. What a beautiful, cherished memory! And what a simple item that brought it all back!

I’m 12 hours away from my home in Mississippi, from my immediate family. I, sometimes, feel very alone in this big city. Family has a way of helping you feel grounded, helping you know your roots so that you can better know who you are. Sometimes, I feel like I don’t have a clue who I am. I’m the only family member here in Houston. There’s no family here to reflect who I am.

I’ll be going home for Christmas this year. I want to be fully present for that trip home. I hope to really get my Dad to open up more about his youth and growing up…tell me some good stories about the good ole days. I hope to get my grandmothers (on both sides) to talk about their lives. And I want to sit back and be a sponge…soaking it all up and soaking it all in.

I wish you a fully present Holiday season with your family! Relish your time and soak it all up!