Every bride dreams of her wedding day. Those dreams usually begin when she’s a little girl. Everything perfect. Every detail thought out completely and executed perfectly. Everything in its place and everything just so. As much as we can dream about a perfect day, it doesn’t mean it’s going to happen that way. I’m not one to get hung up on the small details. I’ve coordinated enough events for work to understand that something isn’t going to go as planned, there is going to be something I haven’t thought about and there is going to be something that didn’t get communicated and therefore leading to a failed execution. I’m not so concerned with that. At the end of the day, Jeff and I will be married and that is the most important thing.
There is a particular wedding day circumstance that stays in the back of my mind and I feel the need to share and address it. I know I’m certainly not the only bride that feels this way and my hopes are that by sharing, it may uplift another bride and maybe give her words that she doesn’t know quite how to express. And to be honest, it’s a reminder to myself. Every bride wants to look her best and most brides elect to lose “x” amount of weight before the wedding. I am no different. My goal was relatively small. 10 pounds, I wanted to lose 10 pounds and if I accomplished that, I was going to lose more. The year of 2018 has proven a year of challenges and setbacks and I can tell you I’m walking down the aisle having lost basically zero. I am ok with this and I’m not ok with it. Let me explain.
There’s not a minute that goes by during the day that I don’t think about needing to get a workout in, to make better food choices, to take the stairs instead of the elevator, to park further from the store to get more steps in, to hit 12,000 steps a day….and the list continues. The truth is, even though I’ve been known as the “fitness girl” several years back, sometimes life’s challenges don’t allow you to be “fitness girl”. As I mentioned before, 2018 has been a year of challenges and setbacks. One of which I recently blogged about, Bell’s Palsy. Other challenges I’ve encountered are…hurting my back 3 times which in turn caused incredible discomfort down my left leg. My beloved cat of 16 years had to be put to sleep. The most difficult decision I’ve made and literally shredded my heart. Two weeks after my beloved cat passed, my beloved, 14-year-old dog became extremely ill, having to go to the ER vet 4 times and her regular vet 3 times. My job moved to Midland, TX which meant I had to find another job in Houston, so I changed jobs as well this year. I am not throwing a pity party and these words are not to hash out all the stuff that went wrong this year. The point of all of this is to say that life happens, and you do the best you can with it. It may not look perfect, but it’s the best you can do, and you must be ok with it, even when you aren’t. When your world falls apart and everything is going wrong, you pick up the pieces and put them back together again as best as you can and that’s all that can be expected. So, I say this as a reminder to myself, instead of beating yourself up, remember the fire you’ve walked through. You’ve survived, and you are still standing and own your wedding day! Celebrate it! Life comes in seasons and this is definitely not the season to be at my top fitness level. One day it will be, but not today and I’m ok with that. Love yourself where you are. Enjoy today! Feel the beauty that makes up who you are and radiate that from within because your wedding day will reflect it. What I’m looking forward to most is sharing this special day with our closest friends and family. We will share our love, our united family and what an incredible day it will be! That is a blessing and everything else is just the details. Love who you are today, where you are today! Own it and rock it down the aisle!
